These things do not come easily for me, yet I know that they are essential skills for me to learn as we progress along our journey. There are times when I need help caring for my home and my husband and I need to figure out how to ask rather than struggle through.

Recognizing that I need help requires taking a moment and asking myself whether I am the best person to do a task. Do I have the right skills to do it safely? Is there someone else in our circle who would be better able to do this? What am I going to have to give up to find the time to do this? Answering these questions honestly can help me accept that I am not the right person and lead me to the next step, asking for help.

Once I have decided that I am not the best choice for completing a task, it is time to reach out to others. We have grown children who are willing and able, but I feel like I am imposing when I ask them for help. I am learning to set aside those concerns and ask anyway; they haven’t said no yet. I do have to be ready to let them take over control of the task and accept their timeframes, not always an easy thing, but well worth it to get their support.

Last year, when our mailbox fell over, I called my son and we had a great experience replacing it. I worked alongside him and we bonded in ways we haven’t for quite a while. By accepting his help and guidance, I was able to move our relationship to a different level. It also helped him understand what I am going through as a CarePartner and opened the door for more opportunities in the future.