Perfection, an impossible task? Perhaps, depending on the expectations I personally attach to it. Is it making sure that all of my husband’s needs are met every day? Does it mean that I get all of my chores and then some done while helping him take care of the things he can’t do that day? That I sometimes push myself to exhaustion just to make sure the house is clean and he is fed and cared for?

I’ve been there a few times and I realized that it wasn’t fun, not for me and not for my husband. When I am trying too hard to keep up with everything, I can lose sight of what really matters, our relationship. If I spend so much time attending to household duties that I am not able to sit and share my day with my husband, what is the point?

So, I have been working on figuring out what perfection could mean in our situation and looking at priorities. I think that for us it is more important to have time to share a laugh about the dust bunnies than to spend energy chasing them. I think that we can go for a walk and let the Roomba do the vacuuming while we enjoy the fresh air. I think that we can sometimes grab take out or even fast food to avoid kitchen chores. I think that what matters most is that we are together creating fun memories rather than worrying about laundry or yardwork. Life is too short, and PD complicates that. I think that if I can be a perfect Partner first, the caring will fall into place.