I yelled at my husband yesterday and he shushed me which only made me yell more. We were working on getting the BBQ grill out of the shed. I was already stressed thinking about the difficulties of getting it cleaned up and ready for summer use. He was trying to help but the space was too tight for both of us. I yelled at him and said “if you’re not going to do it right, get out of my way and let me do it”. He shushed me and I again yelled “don’t you shush me”. It felt necessary to yell in the moment but I know I should have handled it better. Sometimes I just can’t hold it in.

Frustration is a sneaky adversary for me. It strikes best when I am tired, hungry or pushing myself beyond a limit. I was already at a heightened stress level yesterday just thinking about the task ahead, I should have taken a moment and recognized what was happening before starting. If I had talked the job over with my husband, we could have figured out the best way to proceed instead of both jumping in and creating more stress.

My husband and I often have different approaches to the same problem. We know this and yet we continue to tackle things from opposite directions. I also understand that I need to let him help or even take over whenever he safely can. Knowing all of that doesn’t keep me from getting frustrated at times, it just reminds that there will be times to express it in healthy ways and times to walk away and let it go. And to always remember that yelling at him is never the answer.