I was trying to help my husband, encouraging him to stretch a bit further, when he turned to me and said “You don’t understand, you’re not the one with Parkinson’s”. In that moment, my comprehension shifted. He was right, I couldn’t really understand. I am not the one who wakes every morning wondering how my body is going to respond today. I can’t know how difficult it is when my body refuses to do something that worked yesterday or when my brain stops talking to my feet as I struggle to move. I can’t possibly understand how the same stretches that felt good yesterday are just too much today and I really don’t need someone to point it out to me.

What he does need is someone who is here for him. Someone who can listen and be compassionate. Someone who really hears what he says and feels about his challenges and doesn’t immediately shift to trying to find a fix. Because no matter how much I try, I am not a miracle worker and I can’t fix this.

Instead, I need to be a loving presence. I need to listen, observe, and yes, encourage at times, but always remember that he is doing everything he can just to survive. Most importantly, I need to hold him tight and love him through whatever type of day he is having. Being a CarePartner means being a Caring Partner on his journey. It is one that I can share but never completely comprehend.