My husband is always ready to try to do things to help, yet he is also usually aware of the limitations his illness places on his abilities. He knows that he tires quickly and will stop and rest, he knows that he is not as strong anymore, especially on his left side. He knows that he shouldn’t use power tools because his reflexes just aren’t as quick as they used to be. And he knows that he has balance issues which means he shouldn’t be leaning over to pick things up or set them down, something that was driven home to him just yesterday.

I went out to do some yard work and, in typical form, he followed me out. I was clearing out weeds and he was trying to be helpful. I asked him to bring me something from the house and when he did, rather than handing it to me he attempted to set it on the ground. He lost his balance and toppled over bumping his head, shoulder, and knee on the concrete before rolling to a stop. I immediately moved from the role of minimal to maximum caregiver as I helped him get up and go inside to assess the damage. Needless to say, my yardwork was done for the day. Ice packs, bandages, and ibuprofen for him, a glass of wine for me and we made it through.

I can only imagine how difficult it is for him to have to be sidelined as I work doing things we used to do together. He wants to do them but, unfortunately, PD has another plan in place. I thought I was giving him tasks that were safe and that would allow him to help, I was wrong. I must remember to discuss any shared tasks and look for any potential issues before starting. And, I must take the initiative to tell him when I think that he needs to step back and observe for safety’s sake.