During my twelve years as a PD CarePartner, I have had opportunities to be a cab driver, a dietician/nutritionist, a housekeeper, a personal assistant, a wellness coach, a medical advocate, a nail technician, a handyperson (handyman seems so sexist), a landscaper and, at times, a nursemaid. I have so many different hats that I wear each and every day that, if they really were hats, I wouldn’t have a closet big enough to hold them all. I recently realized that amongst all of these hats is one that I often overlook but it’s probably most important, my negotiator’s hat.

This hat is the one I wear whenever I am working to overcome the many challenges we encounter. It may be something as simple as making calls to schedule appointments or it may be something more difficult as I take on the task of negotiating with my husband regarding his care. I get to negotiate with clerks and other customers when we go shopping and I get to negotiate with myself as I struggle to make time to get all of my tasks done.

Successful negotiation involves so many factors. I hear myself discussing, bargaining and debating things that I feel are important every day of my life. Thankfully, my husband is usually open to hearing what I have to say whether he agrees to it or not. Sometimes these discussions result in me talking to myself as I try to find the best way forward. My negotiator’s hat is beautiful (I imagine pink and glittery with ostrich feathers) and transitional as I work to figure things out so I can put on one of my other more sensible hats and move into action.