Our grandson graduated from High School last week and, of course, we wanted to go to his commencement. We adjusted our daily routine so that lunch was on time, but my husband was still able to get a short nap before we needed to leave for the ceremony. His mom gave us tickets for seating on a lower level with easy access and we arrived early to get settled in before the crowd arrived. When it was over, we found our grandson in the lobby and wished him well but skipped the reception, there were too many people and we already had a plan to meet up for a congratulatory dinner the following day.

What really struck me that day was that I was the one feeling anxious. My husband was doing really well and yet I was so stressed over what might happen, I couldn’t relax and enjoy the moment. The crowd made me nervous and I was sure he was going to take a fall. I was extremely conscious of the situation and he was handling it all as if we did it every day. I had thoughts of connecting with our daughter before we left, but that was lost as all I could think of was getting out of there.

We went in to this situation with a plan and with great intentions. Where things went wrong was when I became so focused on what might happen, I lost sight of what was happening. It wasn’t that I wasn’t being respectful of the challenges he faced, but I was forgetting his capabilities. My husband was functioning well, yes there was some risk but we were able to minimize it. My overly active care meter interfered with our ability to enjoy and celebrate the day. Don’t get me wrong, we had a good time but it could have been better. In the future, I will respect his capacity and be conscious of my own unsubstantiated anxieties so they don’t get in the way.