It’s 12:30 am and the kitchen is calling, “Come join me. Your husband’s safely asleep, it’s just you and me. I’ve got some lovely almond milk you can enjoy alongside a piece of toast or fruit. Come on out, it’s time for just you.” Okay, my kitchen may not actually speak to me, but the peace of the night certainly does.

I used to be bothered by what I thought was insomnia before I realized that it is an opportunity. There is a time in the middle of the night when I can let go of everything. The house is all mine, I can enjoy it without worry or stress. I may have a light snack, read a few chapters in a book or sometimes I write. Whatever I do, it is all about me. I am not up every night, maybe once or twice a week, but it is enough.

To a non-CarePartner this may not make much sense. During the daylight hours, when my husband is awake, I am on constant alert. I live in a state of “what if” staying close and listening to make sure all is well. In the midnight hours, I can relax knowing that he is safe in bed which gives me a sense of freedom. These times are my midnight moments, times I have learned to treasure rather than fight. A bit of unexpected “me time” that I share with only my cat. I’ll take it.