It could have been written for me. Prayers and verses seeking serenity can be traced back hundreds, even thousands of years as philosophers and scholars attempted to find the secret pathway to peace. The current version that is used widely throughout 12 step programs was written in the last century and is attributed to American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr and those working with him according to Wikipedia. Whoever actually first coined the term “grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change” could have been living my life, especially since my husband was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease.

Enough about the background, how exactly do I see this text as a guide for my life? Acceptance, courage, wisdom, letting go; what a powerful message. It started when I had to accept that my husband was diagnosed with a disease for which there is no cure at this time. Then, I had to find the courage to face it with him and to do what we could to fight it. In my case that means attending appointments, encouraging exercise and providing on-going care. Finally finding the wisdom to know when I need to let go of the battle. I can’t stop what is happening, I can accept and do my best to make it work for both of us.

If you look further, there is another verse to the Niebuhr version. It continues with advice to live one day at a time and accept the hardships we face along the way. It is a very faith-based message, it was written as a prayer to be delivered from a pulpit, however removing the religious connotations doesn’t negate the wisdom in the text. Whatever your beliefs are, religious or otherwise, you have to admit that life is indeed unpredictable and sometimes the only pathway ahead is accepting what we cannot change so we can work on those things we can. Niebuhr finishes with the hope that these words will help him find happiness in this life, isn’t that what we all hope to find?

I won’t include a link to the entire prayer, google can help you find a dozen different versions on a multitude of religious and recovery-based websites. Instead I will share the short version that I found on Wikipedia in the hope that it will help you find inner peace. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”