Oh my gosh, yesterday was a tough day and it all had nothing to do with my husband’s diagnosis. His cousin, who lives 3000 miles away, is having falls and we appear to be his emergency contacts. We were on the phone for 30 minutes with apartment managers and EMT’s while the cousin refused all offers of assistance. It was really frustrating for both of us. Then, my son called to let us know that my grandson is having a tough time in school. Again, I can only watch from the sidelines and give encouragement, but it is definitely adding stress in my life (like I don’t have enough already).

How do I know that all of these outside stressors are interfering with my role as CarePartner? I was thinking about putting this in my blog this morning while I was helping my husband get dressed. When he looked at me and just said “Pants?”, I realized he was sitting there in his underwear, I had forgotten his jeans. We both had a good laugh.

There are always going to be challenges that happen to other people in our orbit that are outside my control. What I can control is my reaction to those things. Understanding my capacity for added complications in life will help me provide support to extended family and friends without taking away from my primary focus which really must stay on us. Accepting that I cannot fix everything I encounter and being able to articulate those boundaries lets me keep my perspective and my sanity. As I told my husband last night, I don’t have to keep all the spinning plates in the air, just the ones directly above our heads.