Have I got your attention? One study found that the stress involved in our role can put elderly CarePartners (those of us over 65)  at a more than 60% higher mortality rate than our non-caregiving peers. That means that almost 2/3rds of us are cutting our own lives short while trying to help and prolong the lives of our loved ones. We didn’t ask to be put in this position, we all accepted it willingly and do it lovingly; it just doesn’t seem fair does it? What can we do to reverse this alarming trend? We’ve all heard it before, but seriously, we need to figure out how to take care of ourselves first.

Many components of good self care are basic things I already know about. It’s important for me to learn about Parkinson’s Disease and keep current on developments that might impact his care. It is necessary for me to find community resources and support and then utilize their services. I must find time for myself and my own interests. Some of that should be spent away from our house and the responsibilities of my role. I can’t ignore my own health so I will make and keep all my own medical, dental, vision and other appointments. Finally, I have to participate in activities that will lessen the stressors in my life whether that means daily walks around the block or getting to my yoga class every week.

I know the biggest barrier I face in trying to care for myself is time. There just aren’t enough hours in the day to care for my house, my husband and me. If I want to be here to take care of him, I am going to have to find help with some of the chores, carve out protected “me” time and make a conscious effort to prioritize my own needs. It may not make a big difference in the long run, but I can hope that maybe I’ll be one of the lucky third that is able to provide care for my husband without literally killing myself doing it.

For more information on the risks we all face as CarePartners, visit “Caregiver Health” on the Family Caregiver Alliance website. To learn more about how to alleviate those risks, visit “Caregiver Self-Care: Caring for You” on that same website.