There are things I just can’t do. Then, there are things I can do but shouldn’t. Then, there are things I can do and just don’t have time for. Finally, there are things I can do, should do, and make a priority so they get done. More and more this last category involves finding people to help with the things in the other 3 categories. Since organizing things is one of my strengths, that works out well. I am good at finding jobs for other people to do, as my husband will tell you because he used to be the one who got to do them all.

This comes to mind today because I have a crew coming to clean and treat our roof for moss. They’ll be checking the gutter guards and cleaning those too. This all used to be within my husband’s control, which is surprising since he is afraid of heights. Yet he did it because it needed to be done and because I asked. When it fell to me, I tried cleaning gutters once and decided to make some changes. Hence the crew coming today.

When my husband was first diagnosed, we shared the work involved in caring for our home. Since then, most of that has fallen to me. I know that one person cannot easily or safely do the work of two which is why I have to be realistic about how many additional chores can be added to my list. If I am trying to do it all, none of it gets done well. If I am distracted by other tasks when I should be focused on my husband, I am not able to give him the care he deserves. It’s a delicate balance, but I know I would rather err on the side of working with him than doing home maintenance. Maybe it’s not such a difficult choice after all?