I am taking a different approach to my writing today and hope you appreciate it. I have been dealing with some minor plumbing issues and have run into interesting challenges trying to get them fixed. Trying to care for my husband and my house becomes exasperating at times. When I do finally call for help, it means that I have reached the end of my rope. The following poem came out of my attempts to hire a plumber. And by the way, the sink is still dripping.

Not a Plumber

I am not a plumber that’s why I’m calling you today.

I have a faucet that’s dripping, please don’t turn me away.

You see I’m old and tired with too many things to do

And I am really hoping I can depend on you.

When you’re here I have a that toilet that gurgles every night,

I know it shouldn’t make that noise, something just isn’t right.

There’s a sink in my laundry room that needs looking at as well,

And the drain to my washing machine has an interesting smell.

I know these jobs are small and unimportant to you,

But they are driving me crazy! Is there anything you can do?

Other plumbers that I call encourage me to do them on my own.

Perhaps I could, but I don’t want to, so I’m still on the phone.

I understand you’ll have to charge me and I really do not care.

Since having you do these chores keeps me from pulling out my hair.

Because I’m really not a plumber and I don’t want to be.

Won’t you PLEASE get me on your schedule as soon as you are free?