Need I say more? It took me a while to figure this out and I still have to remind myself on a regular basis. I am living in unknown territory as a CarePartner. Things are happening that are out of my control on a daily basis and I can’t fix them. It is frustrating and nerve wracking and I want it all to stop! But, even saying those words makes me cringe because what would that mean? I am definitely not ready for our journey together to be over. How can I even have those kinds of thoughts?

I have those thoughts because I am human. I am not perfect, I don’t know everything and I can’t do it all. I need to cut myself some slack because no matter how hard I try to keep things going smoothly, my husband’s diagnosis of Parkinson’s is going to complicate our lives. Feeling frustrated and powerless is simply where I live these days. I can only do my best with each challenge we face and I have to understand that’s okay.

I will never know why we were chosen by this disease but I will continue to try to make the best of it. That starts with a huge dose of tolerance for the challenges he faces and understanding for any mistakes I make in caring for him. I can only do what I can do and I know it will always be done with love and acceptance for both of us. Meanwhile I try to find patience along the way.