I wasted so much time over the past couple of months worrying about my husband’s need to have his DBS battery replaced. When would he get the surgery and would it be before the old battery completely died? What happens if he doesn’t? What if there are complications to the surgery? Once he was finally scheduled, I worried about how we could get to the hospital at 5:30 am for a 7:30 procedure and where we would park? Some of the early apprehension may have been understandable, but as the situation carried on for a couple of months my concerns really became ridiculous. I mean letting where to park keep me awake at night, seriously?

The day of surgery arrived and I was still quite stressed but determined to just push on through, which we did. Out of bed at 4, out of the house by 4:45, arriving at the hospital at 5:15. We found a Handicapped Parking spot just waiting for us in front of the main doors. Everything at the hospital went well, especially the surgery, and we were on our way back home by 9:30 am.  

The lesson I am taking from this experience is that I shouldn’t doubt my capacity nor my capabilities as a CarePartner. All those worries were based in fear of the unknown. I was letting my imagination run wild with “what ifs”. Yes, there was a chance that his battery could have died while we were waiting but we would have handled it together. It was a challenge getting up so early and yes I was concerned about parking at the hospital but these are all things that I handled on the day. They did not deserve the amount of time or space I gave them in my thoughts. I need to trust that I am able to meet the challenges each day brings. It’s time to focus on positive activities that help me manage, not negative worries that simply add to the burden and stress.