My concept of self-preservation, or self-care as some call it, means that I must find time to breathe. Accomplishing that isn’t always easy but I have a few things that work for me including workarounds for difficult tasks and asking for help on things I really shouldn’t be doing myself. I make the time to do things right the first time and own the fact that my health and happiness matter as much as my husband’s. I recognize when I reach my limits and stop whatever it is to take a break. I understand the importance of putting my needs first.

Practical things involve stepping outside, regardless of the weather, and taking a few deep breaths. When facing a new task, I take a moment to consider what might be the best approach rather than just jumping in to get it done. I don’t try to do everything my husband did, we have different physical limits and I don’t want to hurt myself. I accept that there will be things I can’t or don’t want to do and reach out for assistance. When I need a break I take it and if it means a task has to wait for another day, so be it. I make time to do things I want to do and sometimes that is simply sitting down to eat a donut, one of my favorite treats.

Life is too short and too important for me to let Parkinson’s completely take over. As my husband’s symptoms fluctuate, my challenges will too but that doesn’t mean I can’t still find ways to live a full and meaningful life. Some days that fullness may be mostly taken up with caring for him, but I will still find time to take care of me because if I’m not okay, he’s not going to be either.