I can’t walk through my house without seeing something that needs to be done. It may be a dust bunny peeking out from under the sofa or a basket full of laundry that needs to be put away. No matter how hard I work there is always something more calling my name. I often spend all day long working to care for my husband, our house and yard and end up totally exhausted at the end of the day. I drop into bed only to find that it all has to start over the next morning. It’s a never-ending cycle that has more to do with being alive than being a CarePartner. However, the CP part definitely has added to the list. Which brings me to the question, how to manage it all without wearing myself to a frazzle?
The first and foremost answer is to accept that I can’t do it all, but I should be able to manage it if I prioritize my tasks. There are always things that have to happen so those come first. This would include the care I provide for my husband. Then there are things that either need to happen or that I want to have happen. It’s a delicate balance figuring out which things go on which of those last two lists and tends to be flexible as our situation changes from day to day. It’s a good day when I can find a way to do some of both.
Trying to stay in control of everything my life is one way I fight back against my husband’s Parkinson’s Disease. It is my way of saying, ‘No, you can’t win.” I wonder what would happen if I redefined control to include letting go of some things? I can continue trying to do it all and fail, or I can modify the list to find success and contentment. The dust bunnies will be there tomorrow. I can be too if I can only learn to let go and let them be.
Isn’t that the truth. I’ve learned to let some things slide but I still can’t feel alright with it.
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